I am not dealing well with Halloween Costume Pressure

Ann Curry as Tina Turner and Cher - Celebrity Halloween Costumes - The Daily Beast

Posted using ShareThis


...If only I was a celebrity with the wealth and connections to access an infinite amount of wigs, make up artists, costumes and props...*sigh*

Words to live by

Beginning today, treat everyone you meet as if they were going to be dead by midnight. Extend to them all the care, kindness and understanding you can muster, and do it with no thought of any reward. Your life will never be the same again.

~ Og Mandino

How come boys don't write poetry anymore?

The Arrow and The Song
-Henry Wadsworth Longfellow

I shot an Arrow into the air
It fell to earth I know not where,
For so swiftly it flew, the sight
Could not follow it in its flight.
I breath'd a Song into the air
It fell to earth, I know not where.
For who has sight so keen and strong
That it can follow the flight of a song?
Long, long afterward in an oak
I found the Arrow still unbroke;
And the Song from begining to end
I found again in the heart of a friend.
             ~*~

Found on S and O Productions

The other day I was at JWD Books (AKA best second hand bookstore ever) and I decided to hunt for a really good collection of poems. I didn't have any luck, but perhaps this will tide me
over for the time being.

Strange, cruel World

This morning I listened to a startling story on the radio about a new anti-homosexuality bill being proposed in Uganda. Homosexuality is illegal in that country, and the latest proposed legislation includes sentences of life imprisonment, 'aggravated homosexuality' as a punishable crime, and a legal obligation to report a homosexual to the authorities.

Some of my closest and most cherished friends are gay and lesbian, and the thought that not only would their lives be at risk, but mine as well should I refuse to expose them to the police is sickening.

Here is a comprehensive article on the issue. There is also a fascinating blog entitled GayUganda whose contributors I would argue are very courageous considering the social [and now political] climate in which they live and from where they choose to write about and shed light on issues concerning the gay community in Uganda.

Whenever I learn about things like this I am shocked by my blissful ignorance and also at how truly and deeply fortunate I am to live in a country where I am free to be who I am.

Soo while getting ready for bed, I noticed that my shirt was slightly see-through, and my bra was kind of very visible...not in an 'ooh la la! intentional' way, but in the 'dude, I can totally see through your shirt' way.

DAMMIT!

Good thing I decided to pop into work this aft - having all my coworkers get a free show of my lacy bits was exactly what needed to happen at 3pm on a Monday. Fuck my life.





Editor's Note: Immediately after posting this, an ad for a Wet T-Shirt Contest appeared. Perfect.

Good times

So as you are perhaps aware, there have been several weekends that have coasted by without a single incident worthy or mentioning, these are the weekends when I laze about my house doing nothing, and then I complain about it.

Not this past weekend, no no! I did things, saw people, was out of the house and had a grand time.

Saturday started with lunch at Estia, the new Greek restaurant downtown, I then braved the brittle wind and freezing rain to peruse some stores, do some shopping, and visit my first ever Zine Fair. The fair was pretty fab - my friend Tessa and her bf had a table for their label, even though they don't even live here...they are just. that. hip. AND I they gave me a free cd! Woot woot!

Saturday night was filled with G&Ts, new friends, pumpkin ale and hilarious conversation that lasted until sunrise. Awesome! (and exhausting).

Sunday was perfect. The sun shone, the temperature rose to 20 degrees, Haligonians were out and about and I wore flip flops and a t-shirt.. on the 22nd of October! Breakfast was smoked salmon eggs benny at the Ardmore, my afternoon was basking in the sun while reading the paper followed by a lovely walk in the park, dinner was homemade ribs and mashed potatoes (yum!!) and bedtime was at 8:30pm.

Since I got home, I've noticed that my grandfather is different. He's always been upbeat, the optimist, grateful and helpful to a fault. Now he just seems quiet and quite exhausted. It is very difficult to see.

So I can't think of anything to say.

Today I saw a very impressive TV commercial. It was for Grand Marnier, it was a cartoon and it confirmed everything I believe to be true about living in France and having a fabulous Parisian life. Do you know the one I'm talking about? I'll try to find a video.

Also, if you'd like to see some of the most exquisite interiors ever photographed (and photographed tremendously I might add) click here.

I know I said I would share ideas on my new apartment, and in fact I would love to - I have a whole bunch of photos stored up, I promise. Only thing is that every time I try to upload pictures from my computer my browser inexplicably shuts down. Stupid computer. I really need to buy a new one.

Reflections, more life plans, and an apparent Gwyneth Paltrow obsession:

Tonight I caught a glimpse of myself in the mirror, and thought "Ugh, how unfortunate." On second thought, I believe I actually audibly uttered those words to the sorry reflection looking back at me.

I had hastily pulled my [greasy] hair into what I'll have to call a "rough ponytail", my concealer had all but vanished betraying the dark, baggy circles under my eyes, I'd shoved my [slipper-sock clad] feet into my mother's Blundstones - which peeking out from my trouser jeans resembled clown shoes, and I had LEFT THE HOUSE. That's right, although feeling exhausted, achy, overfull and looking one baggy t-shirt short of ghastly I actually allowed myself to enter the public domain.

(Okay so it wasn't so much "the public domain" as it was driving to my grandparents house to pick up my brother, but still.)

My point is that I have been less than, er, fastidious about my personal health these days. Somehow my life has become more about needless late nights, wine, coffee, tea, carbs, cheese, over-indulgence/eating on an almost daily basis, stress and slovenliness, and less about proper sleep patterns, water intake, fruits&veg, self confidence and improvement, and any/all forms of exercise.

NOT GOOD. And my body is starting to show the effects. (On the plus side, I bought myself a daily multivitamin a week ago and have remembered to take it...3 whole days! Yay improvement??)

Last night I read about a cleanse that Gwyneth Paltrow was raving about, and thought 'I should do that'. For a few deluded moments I had myself thinking "all I need is to do this 21-day total detox and I will emerge healthy, happy, lithe and lean - just like Gwyneth!" Then I noticed that the cleanse includes $350 (!!!) worth of essential meal-replacement shakes and supplements and said delusions quickly faded. 21 days of a mere diet-regime to turn me into Gwyneth Paltrow??!? Yeah friggin' right.

I mean hello:

IMPOSSIBLE.

All this aside, I have decided that the time is now. (Cue fanfare!) I'm changing cities, why not change lifestyles? Well perhaps a complete 'lifestyle overhaul' is a tad drastic BUT I would truly like to do a cleanse/detox of some sort, I'm thinking about cutting out as much dairy as I can muster (as an asthmatic, phlegm and I have been friends for too long and milk and mucus go together like....I don't know I can't think of an analogy.. the fact I just used the word 'mucus' grossed me out and threw me off-kilter), I can practically hear my muscles urging me to get back into yoga, and I know I'll feel a difference if I start drinking more water.

Other plans to re-vamp my life currently include an appointment with a financial planner, reading more non-fiction, and taking a dance class come winter.

How this will all turn out? Who knows?

Maybe Gwyneth Paltrow does... that woman knows everything, just look at her blog.

Check it out!

Just found another fabulous photo blog...er, website. I have never heard of Cade Martin before but I think his work is amazing.


ooh! and if you too are a bookworm at heart, this blog is pretty darn cute

PROcrastination

So there are a million things I should be doing right now but instead I'm painting my nails and watching Glee online. In between coats I did a little browsing and found this fantastic little diddy:




Nice one right? I used to LOVE this song in high school.

OH! and I saw Where The Wild Things Are last night. It was beautiful; everything I wanted and more. Also, the soundtrack was perfect. Par exemple:



GO SEE IT.

I don't know what it is but I can't seem to sit down and write anything coherent. I've been doing plenty of blogable things since arriving in Toronto, but I suppose my head is as much in a nomadic state as my life is right now. I have a few things to share so perhaps in lieu of having the focus to eloquently display them I'll list them off in a non-sensical order.

~.~

The seasons have changed. Suddenly changed. It was all sun and sweaters (ok, and a week of rain) and now there are frost warnings, and bitter winds and a desperate need for scarves and gloves (a darling set of which were purchased yesterday at Winner's after spending far too much time combatting what I believed I called "heinously ferocious winds" on Bloor West.)

This past Thanksgiving Weekend I was in Peterborough staying with a friend and her wonderful family and I was shocked at the exuberance and magnificence of all of the fall colours! One thing about staying in downtown Toronto is there are no trees, which is a shame. Driving around Peterborough and its surrounding areas I was reminded of home and how beautiful the leaves look in Nova Scotia. Sadly, I didn't have the presence of mind to take any photos. (More on that later) So I'll share/borrow/steal a photo or two that a dear friend of mine took in Cape Breton not so long ago. (Thanks Will!)

~.~

My Peterborough Thanksgiving was fantastic.

Okay so here's the deal: This post was supposed to be much longer, and in fact it was. There were photos included - cute ones too! Like me and my new sheep friend at a fall fair! - and reflections, observations, vows - well, maybe not vows, that sounds far too serious - questions, stories, and much, much, more! However instead of hitting 'Publish Post' I apparently (and absently) clicked 'Save Now', and only today did I discover not only were my lovely words and photos not out in the world for all to see BUT half of the post had not in fact been saved in the first place. Enter frusteration; at myself and at my machine.

SO instead of trying to revert to my mental state of this past Wednesday, and recreate this post, I am going to publish what is here and move on to something new. 'Experiencing Technical Difficulties, Please Stand By' and all that jazz. Bear with me my friends, I'll be back on track here soon - I promise.

What a lovely sentiment..

from here

Grown Up Thoughts on a Gray Afternoon

I have been neglecting you, dear blog, and for that I am sorry. My "big city move" is overwhelming it would seem, or at any rate it occupies time that would have been spent blogging back home in Halifax.

Last night I stayed over at my friend's brand new house just outside Toronto. That's right I said HOUSE. She and her boyfriend are homeowners. Whenever a friend of mine buys a condo, or house, or gets engaged (as my friend JMac just did) I am shocked by how 'grown up' we are all turning out to be. Or rather how grown up we actually are. It boggles my mind. I do not feel nearly old enough to be buying houses, planning lives, getting married, etc. and whenever I am confronted with the fact that I am it plain freaks me out.

That being said, I am excited to be embarking on my new adventure, especially to have my own apartment to plan (and there is a post in the works to share all of my apartment plans). I concede that being 'grown up' has plenty of perks, having one's own space among them; and while I believe I will cling on to my 'inner child' with fervour for as long as I can for now - or at least in this moment - being a grown up feels pretty darn good.

Something about a glass half "full"..

This afternoon, as I trekked through the rain on my way to the liquor store (oh, the things I do for a good bottle of wine...) I passed a girl strolling down Front St, rain coat on, hood up, beaming smile on her face. I mean, she looked positively elated - bride on her wedding day, kid in a candy store, blissed out HAPPY. Immediately I thought, "what's with this woman? Why is she smiling while walking through the pouring rain on this gray, gross day? How bizzare." And then I realized how incredibly cynical and pessimistic a thought that was and decided that I need to work on that aspect of myself.

I mean, why shouldn't someone smile through the rain while going for a walk on a Friday afternoon?


Now, off to make a cuppa tea and curl up with Edward Cullen & co. (Yes, I have started reading Twilight. So far I am underwhelmed. It is a pretty quick read though, easy to get caught up in - and a perfect way to pass the time on rainy day.)

Oh yeah,

from Pretty Good

Day One

Well I did it. I actually managed to make it to Toronto... made it meltdown and personal crisis-free I might add. Yay growth!

Now that I'm here, I am faced with actually doing something to begin a life here which is daunting to say the least. I've decided to keep this quote (which I've shared before) in my mind as I look forward to my new 'big city' life:

"Every one of us

is called upon, probably many

times, to start a new life.

A frightening diagnosis, a

marriage, a move, loss of a job...

And onward full tilt we go,

pitched and wrecked and absurdly

resolute, driven in spite of

everything to make good on a

new shore. To be hopeful, to

embrace one possibility after

another - that is surely the basic

instinct... Crying out: High tide!

Time to move out into the

glorious debris. Time to take

this life for what it is."

-Barbara Kingsolver, from High Tide in Tucson
(All this being said, this is definately not a permanent move yet. I managed to bring the bulk of my waredrobe with me, but I've still got a lot of stuff to go through and pack up... and my roommate-to-be won't be arriving until the end of the month, meaning I won't have an apartment until November).

How wonderfully scary and exciting! More updates to come..

I feel a song coming on...

This afternoon I was driving home, and the sun was finally being successful at peeking through the dreary rainclouds that have been dominating the skies. My window was down, the wind was in my hair and good ol' Rich Terfry played this song, and it was perfect.

So I signed on hours ago to write what would likely have been a lengthly, quasi non-sensical entry about my day, or my life, or both.

Then I got distracted.

Now I'm sitting in my bed, finishing off last night's apple crisp, struggling to stay awake and so instead you are stuck with this measley musing:



Today I got a manicure. I felt pampered and they looked lovely. I say looked because I had to go directly from esthetician back to work where I may have smudged the tip of one or two (aargh!) but all in all my nails look right purdy. Oh, and the colour may be my new favourite neutral: a darkish yet subtle taupy grey tone entitled You Don't Know Jacques. It's from OPI's "Collection de France" and the name is amazing. I'm sorry, but being the person who's job it is to come up with names like "Monsooner or Later" or "Miami Beet" (both of which are fab toe or summer-fun colours) or "I'm Not Really a Waitress" (which is just plain glorious, regardless of what the colour is) would be pretty darn fun, if you ask me. That or being the person who names crayon colours. When I was a kid I used to think that was the coolest of dream jobs.

I'm distracted again... and rambling about nail polish. Sorry.

Suffice it to say that I have been awake for 21 of the past 24 hours, I am leaving the day after tomorrow for Toronto for what is currently an indefinite period of time and I have not begun to prepare, one of my best friends just got engaged (!!) and the other is apparently very upset with me (??). Oh, and remember the boy I mentioned on the sly? I went to visit him about a week ago and I think something went awry but I don't know what.


Tomorrow will be better. ...or at the very least the day after that..



So to make up for all of this rambling, here's a photo I found on a new-to-me site called Photography Served. It's from a gallery entitled 'Nightscapes'. Very cool.

Life's Simple Things

I am having yet another uber-relaxing Sunday morning. I just finished a delicious asparagus and smoked salmon omelet, and am just sitting down to a cup of coffee. As my espresso maker bubbled, I thought "that is is perfectly lovely, comforting sound".



So as I enjoy my coffee, allow me to list off some of my favourite sounds:

- the ocean
- a symphony orchestra tuning up
- fall leaves crunching under foot
- hard rain on the roof
- the quiet, deep breaths of a loved one who is sound asleep
- the distinct lack of noise in the middle, or just after, a heavy snowfall (does that count as a sound??)

aww what the heck, how about some favourite smells as well..
- the ocean, salty and refreshing
- the inside of a book, either new or old
- lavender...and vanilla, that may be a tie
- wood fire, especially indoors on a cool, damp day
- salt & sun on skin after a day at the beach
- hot milk cake, fresh out of the oven

I could probably go on... it's nice to stop and think about the tiny things that comfort and bring enjoyment to one every now and again. It's funny too how a certain smell or sound has the ability to instantly transport one to a very specific place and time.

Next time you sit down with a cup of coffee or tea, or a glass of good wine (all of which are also good smells), try pausing for a minute to think of some of your favourites, it's a rather calming thing to do.

I don't know why or how I have never before heard of Melody Gardot before, but my word she is fabulous. Don't believe me? Watch this video. It is everything I wish my life could be.

Aaaand while I'm at it...

...this movie is going to be amazing.




AMAZING.

In case you needed another reason to check out this tv show:

Exits are here, here and here.

Last night I impulsively bought a one-way ticket to Toronto.

I couldn't help it! There were 36 hours left in a seat sale, it cost $89, two of my dearest university friends just happen to be headed into town the weekend I booked, I couldn't figure out when I should return so I just clicked 'Select This Flight', entered my trusty Visa number and am now headed to Toronto for an indefinite period of time, departing in a mere 6 days.

Cue panic.

This is exactly what happened in July when I left my job to move to Toronto, bought a one-way flight at the last minute, spent the night before I was set to depart avoiding packing and instead sitting on my back porch listening to music, making pro/con lists and drinking tea all night long whilst having a semi-meltdown slash severe personal crisis. [Whoa run-on sentence.] Next morning, instead of embarking on my new Toronto life, I called the airline and cancelled my ticket.

Point is, I am not entirely sure I will be able to avoid the same scenario this time around. I don't seem to be as terrified as before, and this time my trip includes immediate excitement and reward however I am still as ill-prepared, have no long term place to stay or job to sustain myself.

Huh.

Nothing says fabulous like black patent pointy toes.

from Ciao, Chessa

I really need to start taking more photos.

Wordplay

Today someone told me that the words on this blog cheered them up in the midst of a bad day.





That's pretty wonderful. I am humbled and honoured at the very thought that what I do here could affect someone...anyone. Thank you to the magnificent person who told me that - you made my heart swell and my eyes smile when I needed it.



It's funny, the power of words. Think of all of the lives changed and transported, all of the relationships started or deepened, the hearts broken and mended. History has been made and told with and through the power of words.



...But what about the words that are unsaid? Perhaps it's bad to think about the "what ifs" of life, but I imagine a lot of lives and relationships would have been altered, and hearts could have been saved, had someone had the courage to say the words that should have been said.



I don't say a lot of things. I have a tendency to internalize my feelings and bottle up my thoughts. I label myself a "shy girl", I dwell inside my head, listen to other peoples problems instead of vocalising my own, I'm not big on telephones, I'd much rather debate (okay argue about) nothing than reveal something. It's really rather a horrible personal trait - one that needs work, I know.



But back to my point - I sometimes wonder how life would be different if people said aloud all of the words that came into their head, or more importantly that they felt in their heart. Think about it: a simple "yes" or "no", "I love you", "I've missed you", "I'm sorry", or "I'm here"; those are the smallest of words but oh, how immensely powerful...when told to those people in our lives that deserve to hear them.

I am a Material Girl

Juuust realized how excessively long Swayze's press release was... sorry folks!

MOVING ON: I spent today at the mall. I was reminded of high school, I ate at the food court and most importantly I purchased this:



(Pause for adoration)

.

.

.

I bought it to wear to the opening gala of the Atlantic Film Fest on Thursday. (One of many benefits of having talented actor friends...) Original plan was to find a fab dress that wouldn't break the bank and that I could wear at something other than a gala. Instead I bought said beautiful top only to realize upon my return home that I have no suitable bottom. Damn.

Any suggestions?

Sad News

Publicist: Patrick Swayze dies at 57
By CHRISTY LEMIRE (AP) – 57 minutes ago
LOS ANGELES — Patrick Swayze, the hunky actor who danced his way into moviegoers' hearts with "Dirty Dancing" and then broke them with "Ghost," died Monday after a battle with pancreatic cancer. He was 57.
"Patrick Swayze passed away peacefully today with family at his side after facing the challenges of his illness for the last 20 months," said a statement released Monday evening by his publicist, Annett Wolf. Swayze died in Los Angeles, Wolf said, but declined to give further details.
Fans of the actor were saddened to learn in March 2008 that Swayze was suffering from a particularly deadly form of cancer. He kept working despite the diagnosis, putting together a memoir with his wife and shooting "The Beast," an A&E drama series for which he had already made the pilot.
Swayze said he opted not to use painkilling drugs while making "The Beast" because they would have taken the edge off his performance. The show drew a respectable 1.3 million viewers when the 13 episodes ran in 2009, but A&E said it had reluctantly decided not to renew it for a second season.
When he first went public with the illness, some reports gave him only weeks to live, but his doctor said his situation was "considerably more optimistic" than that. Swayze acknowledged that time might be running out given the grim nature of the disease.
"I'd say five years is pretty wishful thinking," Swayze told ABC's Barbara Walters in early 2009. "Two years seems likely if you're going to believe statistics. I want to last until they find a cure, which means I'd better get a fire under it."
C. Thomas Howell, who co-starred with Swayze in "The Outsiders," "Grandview U.S.A." and "Red Dawn", said: "I have always had a special place in my heart for Patrick. While I was fortunate enough to work with him in three films, it was our passion for horses that forged a friendship between us that I treasure to this day. Not only did we lose a fine actor today, I lost my older `Outsiders' brother."
Other celebrities used Twitter to express condolences, and "Dirty Dancing" was the top trending topic for a while Monday night, trailed by several other Swayze films.
Ashton Kutcher — whose wife, Demi Moore, co-starred with Swayze in "Ghost" — wrote: "RIP P Swayze." Kutcher also linked to a YouTube clip of the actor poking fun at himself in a classic "Saturday Night Live" sketch, in which he played a wannabe Chippendales dancer alongside the corpulent — and frighteningly shirtless — Chris Farley.
And Larry King wrote: "Patrick Swayze was a wonderful actor & a terrific guy. He put his heart in everything. He was an extraordinary fighter in his battle w Cancer." King added that he'd do a tribute to Swayze on his CNN program Tuesday night.
A three-time Golden Globe nominee, Swayze became a star with his performance as the misunderstood bad-boy Johnny Castle in "Dirty Dancing." As the son of a choreographer who began his career in musical theater, he seemed a natural to play the role.
A coming-of-age romance starring Jennifer Grey as an idealistic young woman on vacation with her family and Swayze as the Catskills resort's sexy (and much older) dance instructor, the film made great use of both his grace on his feet and his muscular physique.
It became an international phenomenon in the summer of 1987, spawning albums, an Oscar-winning hit song in "(I've Had) the Time of My Life," stage productions and a sequel, 2004's "Dirty Dancing: Havana Nights," in which he made a cameo.
Swayze performed and co-wrote a song on the soundtrack, the ballad "She's Like the Wind," inspired by his wife, Lisa Niemi. The film also gave him the chance to utter the now-classic line, "Nobody puts Baby in a corner."
Swayze followed that up with the 1989 action flick "Road House," in which he played a bouncer at a rowdy bar. But it was his performance in 1990's "Ghost" that showed his vulnerable, sensitive side. He starred as a murdered man trying to communicate with his fiancee (Moore) — with great frustration and longing — through a psychic played by Whoopi Goldberg.
Swayze said at the time that he fought for the role of Sam Wheat (director Jerry Zucker wanted Kevin Kline) but once he went in for an audition and read six scenes, he got it.
Why did he want the part so badly? "It made me cry four or five times," he said of Bruce Joel Rubin's Oscar-winning script in an AP interview.
"Ghost" provided yet another indelible musical moment: Swayze and Moore sensually molding pottery together to the strains of the Righteous Brothers' "Unchained Melody." It also earned a best-picture nomination and a supporting-actress Oscar for Goldberg, who said she wouldn't have won if it weren't for Swayze.
"When I won my Academy Award, the only person I really thanked was Patrick," Goldberg said in March 2008 on the ABC daytime talk show "The View."
Swayze himself earned three Golden Globe nominations, for "Dirty Dancing," "Ghost" and 1995's "To Wong Foo, Thanks for Everything! Julie Newmar," which further allowed him to toy with his masculine image. The role called for him to play a drag queen on a cross-country road trip alongside Wesley Snipes and John Leguizamo.
His heartthrob status almost kept him from being considered for the role of Vida Boheme.
"I couldn't get seen on it because everyone viewed me as terminally heterosexually masculine-macho," he told the AP then. But he transformed himself so completely that when his screen test was sent to Steven Spielberg, whose Amblin pictures produced "To Wong Foo," Spielberg didn't recognize him.
Among his earlier films, Swayze was part of the star-studded lineup of up-and-comers in Francis Ford Coppola's 1983 adaptation of S.E. Hinton's novel "The Outsiders," alongside Rob Lowe, Tom Cruise, Matt Dillon, Ralph Macchio, Emilio Estevez and Diane Lane.
Other '80s films included "Red Dawn," "Grandview U.S.A." (for which he also provided choreography) and "Youngblood," once more with Lowe, as Canadian hockey teammates.
In the '90s, he made such eclectic films as "Point Break" (1991), in which he played the leader of a band of bank-robbing surfers, and the family Western "Tall Tale" (1995), in which he starred as Pecos Bill. He appeared on the cover of People magazine as its "Sexiest Man Alive" in 1991, but his career tapered off toward the end of the 1990s, when he also had stay in rehab for alcohol abuse. In 2001, he appeared in the cult favorite "Donnie Darko," and in 2003 he returned to the New York stage with "Chicago"; 2006 found him in the musical "Guys and Dolls" in London.
Swayze was born in 1952 in Houston, the son of Jesse Swayze and choreographer Patsy Swayze, whose films include "Urban Cowboy."
He played football but also was drawn to dance and theater, performing with the Feld, Joffrey and Harkness Ballets and appearing on Broadway as Danny Zuko in "Grease." But he turned to acting in 1978 after a series of injuries.
Within a couple years of moving to Los Angeles, he made his debut in the roller-disco movie "Skatetown, U.S.A." The eclectic cast included Scott Baio, Flip Wilson, Maureen McCormack and Billy Barty.
Off-screen, he was an avid conservationist who was moved by his time in Africa to shine a light on "man's greed and absolute unwillingness to operate according to Mother Nature's laws," he told the AP in 2004.
Swayze was married since 1975 to Niemi, a fellow dancer who took lessons with his mother; they met when he was 19 and she was 15. A licensed pilot, Niemi would fly her husband from Los Angeles to Northern California for treatment at Stanford University Medical Center.
Copyright © 2009 The Associated Press. All rights reserved.

Love All

I'm not sure why, but I love watching tennis matches on tv.

...actually I am sure why:

Reading, Resting, Relaxing

It is grey and rainy outside, which is just fine by me, because I am holed up inside.

I woke up early, made a pot of tea and sat down with a china tea cup and saucer (one must be proper on Sunday mornings) today's paper, yesterday's Globe, a pencil for the crossword puzzle, a new book to read and a CD of Mozart piano concertos to play in the background.

Perfection.

Now my blissful morning has passed, and despite plans to have a productive afternoon, I find myself lazing on my unmade bed, reading blogs, listening to Ella and Louis (whom I kind of wish were my friends) and putting off cleaning my rather atrociously untidy room.

I may even take a nap... and I won't even feel bad if I do because naps are what rainy Sunday afternoons are for.

Hope everyone is getting in a little R&R before another week begins! (I highly recommend it)

The body is a house of many windows: there we all sit, showing ourselves and crying on the passers-by to come and love us. ~ Robert Louis Stevenson

Tangobaby, you know what's up.

You DO exist!

Due to my blogging ineptitude, I just noticed the lovely comments that have been posted (some an embarrassingly long time ago).



Severe lack of blogging manners aside, this is AWESOME. I actually and honestly grinned from ear to ear and yelled "People read me!" while pumping my fists in the air.





Thank you! thank you! thank you! dear commenters, you have made my day.

HOME SWEET (vastly expensive) HOME

So I just spent far too much time looking at prospective houses/condos/lofts online.

Mother phoned this morning and told me to look up Red Door Reality because one of our neighbours had put his house up for sale (for a cool 3/4 million, if you don't mind) and needless to say, I got carried away.

I then decided to see what a quaint house for one would cost 'round these parts, and then what a new condo would cost, and then what a summer home in Mahone Bay would set me back, and before you can say 'fixed mortgage' an hour (ok maybe more) had gone by and I was on TorontoLofts.com looking at the floor plans of $600,000 condos.

Lately I've been thinking that I would really like to invest in real estate. I figure if I'm going to spend $X hundred in rent every month, I might as well put it towards owning something of my own. Ahh what a wonderful notion - an entire space that is mine and only mine. It is probably the only "grown-up thing" that doesn't freak me out. Marriage? Eek! Long-term career? OHGod.. Children? (look of utter shock/mild nausea) House to call my own? Alright..

Sadly, I am as green as the basil on the caprese salad I had for lunch today when it comes to real estate and realistically there is no way I can currently afford anything close to my dream home. Anybody want to go splits on an overpriced, slightly minuscule yet grossly fabulous loft in an old Toy Factory?? Anybody??

Just a pretty little somethin' I found here.

Well what have we here...

I think I've already mentioned the great Sunfiltered blog. I check it periodically and every time I do I make a mental note to tune in more frequently. For example, today I discover the Full Frontal Fashion Blog, which looks way cooler than I could ever hope to be...

FULL FRONTAL FASHION blog launch!

September 9th, 2009 by Sundance Channel

Announcing the launch of FULL FRONTAL FASHION, an all new style destination offering insider access to the highly creative world of contemporary fashion. Meet the designers, influencers, artists and trends at the forefront of international style and glamor. FULL FRONTAL FASHION will unveil the craft, creativity and passion of the most authentic artists working in, and around, the world of fashion today.

Rarely is fashion considered purely as an art form — it’s more of a publicity tool, a shopping opportunity or status symbol. Yet, behind the label, in a small warehouse or atelier somewhere, designers put their pens to paper, take a 2-dimensional inspiration and make it a 3-dimensional work of art.

We want to celebrate that process with FULL FRONTAL FASHION — and show all the exciting underpinnings of putting together a collection. We hope to start with inspiration, which as we all know can be anything, and explore construction and ultimately how and why clothing gets sold and worn.

We have gathered a diverse group of creative writers, photographers, artists and stylists to write about their fashion perspective each day on the FULL FRONTAL FASHION blog.

Log On. Tune-In. Buckle Up!

TV Dorkiness

Glee premieres tonight and I am essentially planning my evening around it. I am pumped.

1 hour PrimeTime Musical Comedy??
SIGN. ME. UP.

My blogging, Myself

I freakin' love stumbling upon new (to me) blogs. Whenever I come across a new photo blog or inspirational blog or rambling blog that is interesting, entertaining and well put together I get a feeling similar to that when you find an old photo album buried at the bottom of a storage box: "How long has this been here?" "How exciting!" "I had no idea this existed" "Look at all of the great stories in here!" etc.

Today I finally remembered to get my best friend's blog address from her. I've...

HOLD THE PHONE A MOUSE JUST RAN ACROSS MY KITCHEN FLOOR!!! GDAMMIT! FRIGGIN' RODENTS... IF IT ISN'T A FAMILY OF OBNOXIOUSLY LOUD SQUIRRELS IN MY BACKYARD OR AN ALLEGED RAT ON MY BACK PORCH (that's right, a rat was apparently spotted chasing said squirrels off my back porch today.. not a welcome solution to the squirrel problem) IT'S A BLOODY MOUSE (not so) CASUALLY SCURRYING FROM THE OVEN TO THE DISHWASHER....


(Ahem). I digress.

I've been trying to find her blog for ages et voila I now have access. It's wordy which is not at all bad but very interesting to me because throughout our entire friendship she has been the open, effusive, talkative one and I have been the inward, private, sit-back-and-take-it-all-in one. This is exactly how our blogs are. She writes (in her lovely way which is exactly like she talks aloud) about her day to day life, her personal thoughts and opinions and the people surrounding her who affect her the most. I borrow blog entries, share photos and videos, comment assertively yet objectively on various things I find, and share information from other people but rarely about myself.

I sometimes hate (and I use this word deliberately) my inability to open up. It is a truly hideous trait to possess when at a party or meeting new people or on a date (especially the latter) and the amount of effort it takes me to make small talk, or share stories or divulge information is truly exhausting. I must say that I feel I am getting better at this...at the very least I'm a work in progress. (Sharing a personal blog with the world has got to count for something in this regard am I right?)


P.S. On the subject of newly found blogs, did you know that Gwenyth Paltrow has one?! Truth be told, I haven't quite figured it out yet, but leave it to JMac to put me on to that one..

I think this is awesome!

So What Do We Think About This?

This month Glamour magazine ran this photograph which has created quite a stir here in the US. It seems women desperately want more images that highlight the variety of beauty that the female form has to offer. If that is true, then this should become one of the biggest selling issues in Conde Nast history. Actually it just might become the biggest seller. When we wanted to do a post about this Tracy went to three different shops to find the magazine but all three were sold out. We had to scan this from the NY Post. When I am shooting on the street older women and larger size women often say "no" to my request to shoot them. Actually, much more than any other category of people I shoot. I think they have a real suspicion about how the image will be used. I also think there continues to be a growing disconnect between the fashion community and "average" women in general However, do you think that this economic crisis has forced the fashion community to open it's eyes a little bit to what the customers want?
posted by The Sartorialist

I think Sunday is my favourite day of the week..

Today was a perfect fall day. The sun was bright and warm, the air was crisp, there was a slight breeze - just enough to russle half-green leaves on trees - the kind of weather that calls for deep breaths and thoughts of new possibilities.

I took advantage of this wonderful day: took my faithful dog for a long walk at PPP, then I met my grandparents and godmother for lunch on the boardwalk (vegetable gyoza followed by sirloin steak sandwich with oriental house salad accompanied by a Stutz apple cider - divine), went for a drive, did [yesterdays] crossword on the back porch while listening to Amelia Curran, dinner, and now amazing Mediteranean lemon yoghurt for dessert.

Oh, and I also encountered one of my favourite things about a Haligonian September, which I am shocked I neglected to mention the other day: cute college boys. Yes folks, the universities are back in session, the students are back in town and the cute boy quotient has increased exponentially. Talk about bliss...

Psst...

Okay, so at the risk of feeling like I'm on blogger overload, may I just blurt this out:

The other day someone told me he loved me and every time I think about it I can't help but smile.

So two friends of mine are getting married this weekend. Well, they're not so much "friends" anymore as they are just people I've known since I was 10 years old. I'm not going to the wedding. Both my mother and I were invited, as my mom is good friends with the bride's mother. Mother is going, but I couldn't justify the trip (the wedding is in Ontario).

ANYHOW my point is that this morning I wrote a card for the happy couple. And it was corny. We (mother and I) couldn't figure out what to say so I ended up writing

Live well. Laugh often. Love much.
Wishing you a lifetime of happiness.
Congratulations!

Lame-o!

When my sister left for Mexico, I wrote her a much better note, which included not Emerson, but a quote from Nehru which said

“We live in a wonderful world that is full of beauty, charm and adventure. There is no end to the adventures we can have if only we seek them with our eyes open.” - Jawaharial Nehru

I found it in this article and I think that it is true.

Visions of Autumnal Bliss

Somehow it is September. I'm not sure how that happened, or why Mother Nature felt it fair to bestow a mere 2 weeks of summer on us vitamin D deprived Nova Scotians, but there you have it.

That being said, Halifax is a pretty awesome place to be in September. Today the Atlantic Fringe Fest starts (yay affordable theatre!!) and in two weeks time the Atlantic Film Festival gets underway. Plus the weather is usually fairly agreeable and the city is bustling with the influx of university students back for another year.

I tried really hard to get a job with the Film Fest this year, but to no avail.

Ok so perhaps that's a lie. I didn't try that hard. But I did look into it, make a resume, email some people whom I new were hiring, tell my friend who actually works there to drop some hints, and still nothing. Ah well, guess that wasn't meant to be.

Every year I promise myself to participate in/attend the Film Fest, and usually I fail to hold up my end of the deal but last year I managed reasonably well and this year my bestest friend is in three movies! That's right three. How amazingly exciting right?? I feel especially invested because I helped her prepare for her auditions, and I ran lines with her, and some of the clothes which she borrowed for me may have made it into a few scenes. (That and of course she has worked her tail off and deserves to be a Halifamous movie star).

Festivals are amazing because they give the community a unique opportunity to be exposed to something which they may not ordinarily have access to as well as giving local artists an avenue through which to showcase themselves. Plus there's an influx of people in town, there are always parties and events happening and... well it's just awesome. Festivals are the shit. Music (a la Stewart Park I attended in July), Film, Fringe or otherwise.

All in all, September holds promise. Lots of artistic/cultural excitement, a trip to Toronto to see one of my dearest friends whom I haven't seen in 3 years, and a bit of a new start. Hopefully by the end of this month I will be in the midst of a grand adventure somewhere, and come cold, dark winter I'll be able to look back on September and smile at how fantastic a time I had.

Daydreaming

So I'm sitting in my little sister's room helping her pack (aka she's going through her entire closet while I fiddle on the internet and drink a much needed americano).

She is nervous and unsure about what to bring, what her trip will bring, etc. but I for one am excited for (and exceedingly jealous of) her.

I wish that I was the one going away. I can't stand that I am still here, and that I have no plans, and that I cannot seem to make plans for myself. How infuriating.

That being said, I've already scored two new pairs of jeans out of her - woop! woop!

Inspiration

I just got back from watching Kevin Fox perform at The Carleton, a local - very small - venue. I honestly had never heard of him, but his concept of arranging music solely for cello and voice was very intriguing.

The show was amazing. As a former cellist, watching him perform and hearing the sounds he was able to produce with such confidence and precision was breathtaking.

I love the cello. It is my favourite instrument. I have a theory that virtually every song - certainly every ballad - can be made infinitely better if a cello part is included and I am truly amazed at the vast range of sounds and tones this instrument is able to emote.

After the concert I bought a cd and felt compelled to thank Kevin Fox for a remarkable performance and an enjoyable evening. I was not eloquent, and undoubtedly came across as someone far less than who I would prefer to be perceived as, but nonetheless I am glad I got the chance to thank the man who moved me, inspired me, and took me for a trip down memory lane.

Ack! Great musical talent just boggles my mind...

Pity Party - Table for One

So I've been in a really odd head space the past few days, and I'm not sure why. All I know is it's 4:30 in the morning and I'm still awake. Do you ever have those nights? Nights when you can't seem to turn your mind off and you fight reason, sleep, and time as you toss in your bed until the wee hours of the morning? Perhaps not. I hope not.

I don't know, lately I feel (to revert back to my treading water metaphor) like I can't find my way to the surface, or rather that I am perfectly capable of swimming to safety if only I would kick my legs. I'm just tired of telling the same white lies every time someone asks me what I'm doing, what I'm up to, or what my plans are. The truth is I don't know the answer to any of these questions, which is scary, and apparently impossible to admit. Ugh and I can't stand the 'looks' either. Whether it be pity, disapproval, concern, smugness, tolerance, judgement, whatever, I sometimes wish people could refrain from letting their reaction to my sorry answer show all over their face.

I've also been rather angry as of late (which may or may not be evident). Again, I'm not sure where it comes from...well, I suppose it is self-directed, although I'm pretty good at transferring that to whomever happens to say something at an improper time.

I wish I had the skills to pull myself out of this funk..this rut..this...coma I've fallen into. I know that there are people around me who are able to help me in this regard but reaching out requires courage, and courage requires energy, and energy requires actually sleeping at night.

Hmm. I guess for now I'll be grateful for cups of tea and online tv shows, and maybe - just maybe - I'll close my eyes and get some rest.

This is just much more eloquent than I could ever put it...

No one knows more about love than the heartbroken. Those whose hearts have been slashed, torn, bruised, thrown away, stomped on and even recycled know all too well that it takes a bit more than some salve and a Batman Band-Aid to heal their wounds and regain their superhero powers.

Simon and Garfunkel are privy to that secret too.

A winter's day/In a deep and dark December/I am alone/Gazing from my window to/the streets below/On a freshly fallen silent shroud of snow/I am a rock/ I am an island-- they sang during the swinging '60s - a time of pondering and predicting.

I can't help but feel like a solitary rock. An island tucked deep away from any sign of civilization. Can we ever truly be an island unto ourselves? When does aloneness become loneliness?

Don't talk of love/But I've heard the words before
As much as we want it to be, love isn't always red roses and sweet candy. This week, lovers will be buying roses and carnations by the dozen and walking hand-in-hand with their sweetie as they rifle through that box of candy hearts looking for the perfect sentiment to appropriately mark the occasion.

Take me last year, for example: I had hope. I had determination. I had resolved that I, too, would find my other candy-heart half. I waited and waited - and waited - for my Prince Charming, roses in hand, but neither the horse nor the prince galloped to my doorstep. And when I realized that it was nearly impossible to beat a dead horse who is not even there, I vowed to give it all up. The search over. The curtain closed. Love obviously didn't want me, so I didn't want it. Heck, not only did I not want it, I didn't need it.

I've built walls/A fortress deep and mighty/That none may penetrate
So in an attempt to cloister myself from the world, I found myself on my own island. At first, I felt at home with the surrounding nature. I could sit on the metaphorical sunny and sandy beach all day and bask in having an entire island all to myself. I longed to be a ruler of one, and here I am, finally achieving peace, I thought. Safe. Isolated. Relieved.

And a rock feels no pain/And an island never cries
But happy? I kept waiting for it, hoping it would magically appear or fall from the leaves of the magical palm trees nearby, but it never came. The plain truth was that in my search for shelter, for safety, for some semblance of peace and clarity, I'd accepted seclusion as the most suitable option.


And like the song, I have my own books - or in my case, my own magazines - to protect me. They're my suit of armor -- something I can easily and conveniently hide behind. I'd never have to face anyone as long as I keep a fresh supply of shiny stacks close by. My words could forever be my mask, my own private disguise.

But in reality, can it really be only one or the other? Are we forced to choose between complete aloneness or complete saturation in society?

It can't be that black and white. Because it's got to get pretty lonely on that massive island all by yourself - not to mention all those cold and windy nights. There has to be a boat out on the horizon somewhere. Its lights are peeled ahead, desperately looking for you. And something tells me you're looking for it too because whether I'll admit it or not, I'm looking for that rescue boat too. When it docks at the shore, I'll hop on, but this time, maybe I'll leave the raggedy old books and things behind. After all, do I really actually definitely need them anymore? I think I'm strong enough now to weather the storm without them. Maybe I've found my superhero power once again.

Until we meet...



Borrowed from So about what I said...

Just another movie trailer...

I'm listening to Cat Stevens 'If You Want to Sing Out Sing Out' right now. It's kind of exactly what I want to be listening to.

I saw Harold and Maude while sitting outside on the Boardwalk eating fresh made popcorn and drinking red wine. I was at the Alfresco Film Fest (one of my favourite Halifax summertime activities) and it was awesome. The movie is too cute for words, and I think Maude's sage advice is worth listening to. You should see it.

Could my inner fashionista BE more excited?!

On a completely separate note...

I indulged in two magnificent things today:

(1) Hand-paddled vanilla ice cream with brown sugar fudge and butter crunch [Yum!]

(2) The September issue of Vanity Fair. [I very rarely buy magazines - exciting!]

Scene 24, Take 1

Do you ever watch a movie and wish it was your life?

I do it all the time.

I love movies. I took several film classes in university, I appreciate the artistry and hard work that is involved in their creation and I admire their ability to transport an audience to any time or place while evoking feelings that are perhaps unexpected.

Sometimes I think I love movies too much. 'Love' perhaps is not the proper term. I adore movies, in the sense that I look up to them and trust them to provide answers to my questions. I have found myself thinking - on more than one occasion - 'if my life were a movie more exciting things would happen' or 'gawd what a boring scene this would be' or 'this song would be perfect for a film montage'. Pathetic, I know.

I have a tendency to indolence. Far too often I feel like I am sitting, waiting for my life to happen to me. As if I were patient enough, my grand adventure would fall into my lap. Perhaps I'd encounter it at a missed airplane connection, or in the dressing room at a vintage shop, or during my next elevator ride. This is what happens in films - the bad ones and the good ones. Then again, even if things don't always turn out - guy doesn't end up with girl, new house is a nightmare, heroine fails, hero falls - lessons are always learned, there is always growth, the audience is left satisfied (best case scenario), stupefied (worst case scenario) and with a common sense of experience.

My lack of motivation is one of my least favourite traits. This summer, and to be honest for the past year and a half, it has been the cause of much stress and numerous sleepless nights. Whenever confronted with the future (duh, duh, duuuuh) I get overwhelmed by all of the amazing possibilities that lie ahead. I become terribly worried that I'm going to pick the wrong path, miss my true opportunity and consequently drastically diverge from what is supposed to be my life. Or something. It's all very complicated.

I've decided that enough is enough: this fall I am going to make a decision and stick to it. Who knows if it will be "the right one" or "the wrong one", and really, who cares? I figure as long as I make a choice, live by that choice, and learn through the process, I can do no harm. After all what is life if not a series of experiences - both shared and solitary? Drama, adventure and romance are swell and I hope to encounter all three throughout my life however they are also delusions of grandeur when viewed through Hollywood's lens.

So here's to movies as entertainment and life as experience! (Worse comes to worse I can turn my failures into a screenplay and make a mint...)

I wish Fashion Photography depicted real life.

Seriously.

photos found here

Urban Art - a reminder that life is indeed beautiful

Street Rothko

Shared via AddThis

found here

A Case of the... Tuesdays ?

Today I worked at my old job. My former boss called last night and left a lengthy, desperate message about how crazy things were and could I possibly offer any of my time to come in and do odd jobs, etc. and I figured since my days aren't all that exciting, and my bank account is steadily diminishing, why not.

It was weird. Things were exactly the same whilst being subtly different. A few times throughout the summer I've regretted quitting, mostly because no part of my summer has turned out as planned, and while I've been bragging about my self-proclaimed status as a "lady of leisure" life has been pretty dull. Pretty dull, and plenty lonely. I remembered how good I was at my job, but I also remembered the monotony of it. I worked a half day, it went by fast and I said I'd stop by tomorrow. Now that I'm home I'm quite tired and I can't decide how I feel about the situation.

Worst part of the day was having to explain what I'd been up to all summer, and why I hadn't moved yet. This question is always tricky as I have no real answer. Any and all I come up with are either rather pathetic or incredibly self-deprecating.

I'm also now in a mood because upon her arrival home, my sister decided to tear into me for no reason. No wonder I'm exhausted and generally disapproving of my current living situation...

So now, after opening up the fridge, spying a can of Stella and thinking a beer was a fabulous idea, I'm two sips in, have (a tad unsuccessfully) avoided an argument and I think I'd much rather a giant cup of tea.

I make a damn good Tour Guide..

I feel like I have been neglecting you, dear blogworld - how utterly terrible of me. This weekend one of my cousins came into town. He's my age, visiting from Ottawa and thus I felt compelled to show him around. Touring and family bonding-esque activities have consumed my recent days, and to prove it I have acquired a photo collage filled with wonderful summer-y, tourist-y fun activities including the beach (YAY!!) and BeerFest. More compelling post to come, I promise.

As an aside, I also got a chance to view Jupiter through a telescope this weekend. I was just strolling down the boardwalk when low and behold I come upon two astronomy enthusiasts with telescopes pointing at the sky - one on Jupiter and one on the moon. Apparently Jupiter is only visible 3 or 4 times a year, and four moons were visible. I freakin' loved it. Dorky? Perhaps. Wicked cool? Unequivocally.

Keep Breathing

Written by Ingrid Michaelson

The storm is coming but I don't mind
People are dying, I close my blinds

All that I know is I'm breathing now

I want to change the world
Instead I sleep
I want to believe in more than you and me

But all that I know is I'm breathing
All I can do is keep breathing
All we can do is keep breathing now

All that I know is I'm breathing
All I can do is keep breathing
All we can do is keep breathing

All we can do is keep breathing
All we can do is keep breathing
All we can do is keep breathing
All we can do is keep breathing
All we can do is keep breathing now

My darling friend Sarah introduced me to this song the other day. I like it. Simple, yet poignant - plus I'm a sucker for any song that includes a cello..

I want this to happen to me.

How Great must it be to be the author of this message...

I went to see (500) Days of Summer tonight. It was everything I thought it would be and more. Go see it.

Buyer's Remorse

So when I was away, I stumbled upon (aka was taken directly to by shopoholic cousins) a shoe factory outlet store. It carried mostly Naturalizer, whose shoes are super comfortable, erganomic, etc but which tend to be a little on the granny side stylistically. So imagine my excitement at the surprising selection of cute shoes at this store. Super cute shoes - and at a minimum, yes minimum discount of 30% off.

My cousins and I took over the store - in our typical fashion - and tried on dozens of shoes. I found a glorious pair of pewter loafers that were on sale for the rediculous price of $29.99. All of my inner instincts were telling me to buy those shoes, even if I had purchased a pair of loafers not 2 weeks prior.

I did not.

Instead, I decided to be practical; and may I say that that is the last time I will do so.

I bought a boring pair of black mary janes so that I would have comfortable, ergonomic shoes to wear when I'm serving (catering being my only real job these days). The black shoes were not $29.99. They were $69.99 and they were a mistake.

I can think of at least 3 occasions since my return back home when I thought, 'those silver loafers would be perfect for this outfit/outing'. Today was my first catering shift in ages so I busted out my new black shoes and they BUSTED up my feet. Granted, my knees are noticably uh, not sore considering I've just been standing up for 12 and a half hours but good god you should see my heels. Blisters like you would not believe. For the past oh, 3 hours every step has felt like blades jabbing into the back of my feet, and once I got and took the damn shoes off I discovered two blisters - one on each heel, each in identical locations - and by 'blisters' I mean way-past-the-blister-stage, nickel-sized open wounds. OWWWWW. :(

"Practical Purchase" = BIG failure. Never. Again