Monday, February 11, 2013

Starting over

Since the beginning of this year I have been on a quest to figure out who I want to be. Specifically, I have been trying to pinpoint the thing I want to do - the job I want to have. It is extraordinarily difficult. I'm filled with anxiety whenever anyone asks me "what do you do?" or "what are you up to these days?", I often feel like I am making extremely poor use of my time, and I can't help but think that I am not equipped with the skills necessary to decipher who I want to be and where that girl might want to start her career.

I make steps, but they are small. I research companies, read articles, look up school opportunities, and meet with people. I feel very much like I'm behind, that I missed some crucial step or link along the way and that is the reason why I don' t have stable careers or homes or cars like so many other people my age do. But F. Scott Fitzgerald is right: it is never too late to be whoever you want to be. It definitely takes strength to start again, and it is tiring, but in my case what is so wonderful is that I am surrounded by support and I do feel like I'm getting there.

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